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Saturday, 4 February 2012

In control? Out of control?

Well, life right now is actually pretty good. Miss Cynical here isn't so negative about what's going on with herself anymore - maybe more blogs will follow ranting about the world in general...but if I were to write one now, it'd turn into one big essay - so I won't.

I read an article on The Guardian online the other day, about the regrets of people on their death-beds ( http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying ), and it made me think.

Generally I'm very "live for the moment", but there are things I hold back on as I'm scared of something negative happening, and ultimately being let down.
In the article number three and five apply to me (Expressing Feelings & Not Letting Yourself Be Happier).

I've allowed myself to be happier by not dwelling on my health, and working through my fatigue - just getting on. I'm also moving out to Hove with a good friend from work (Sam), and her friend Hayley. Moving out was a quick decision, but a good one (although I'm sure my liver won't be so happy, as I envisage more drinking at the weekends....)

In regard to expressing my feelings, due to past shitty boyfriends, being single for a long time, and no relationship lasting longer than two months (wow, I must be putting a good impression of myself out there huh), I generally don't express them, and have regretted not doing so in the past. I'm a sensitive soul really ;)

As life is so short and all, taking control of life a bit more will hopefully mean I won't have too many regrets on my death bed.
Read the article, if you haven't already - it's a good read and will make you think.

Sorry for making this blog sound like some kind of personal, self-help diary. I guess this is me expressing my feelings, without having to babble on to my friends after one too many ciders (although I'm sure that happens anyway - I have a tendency to ramble...if you hadn't noticed already!)

Ciao for now (let's hope for no snow...)



stuart said...

I read that article too. The one which got me was 'I wish I hadn't worked so much'... Still working a 40 hour week at FI. That really has to change. A really thought provoking article that one was, and a bit scary too.

Jo said...

A 40 hour week which includes every sodding Saturday - bad times!

That does indeed have to change. I'm glad I applied for the job at L&G - actually happy there.

stuart said...

That is good to hear. My mission for tomorrow is sorting out my CV...

Jo said...

Do it! You don't want to be THAT guy who says on his death-bed : "I wish I hadn't worked so hard..." Let alone THAT guy who might say: "Damnit, I worked until I was 70 years old in a call-centre" (I imagine he would have absolutely no shred of sanity left...)